Child's Play

When my Mom died, I died.

And then, in our very next breaths after our respective last ones, we both were reborn.

She, into her new Heavenly-colored world in the Infinite Dimension. I, into a womb of protective restraint, within the crumbling walls of my own, grief-stricken life.

Since then, I have spent my spiritual gestation inside a chrysalis of healing Light. I have received Angelic Aid, where no lesser form of guidance would've sufficed.

For the five and a half years since Mom's ascension, I have been surviving, growing, building, learning, strengthening, self-nourishing. And collecting every ounce of energy I would need to face THIS VERY MOMENT in time.

Now is when I break free of the safety that has held me necessarily still. NOW, I am finally ready to break out. To spread these brilliant wings. Ready to "tame my dragon", or "fly my Falcor". Ready to take charge, gain control, master my Fear and then use it as Fuel. With help from outside the realm of Self, I am prepared for takeoff!
And this time, I have decided to fly so high and so far, that I will reach the place where the primitive limitations of Ego and Fear will be nothing more than remnants of a darker, slower history. In the meantime, I am charging forth. I am taking every challenge I can find. Learning and doing things I've always "wanted to" or "thought about" or "talked about" learning and doing. I am facing every fear I have. I am turning the Dream I've been chasing into the Actuality I have created.

As the karmic/genetic r/evolution marches forward in Time, I am reliving my childhood. But this time, I am doing so - knowing what I know now. I am combining the profound spiritual lessons I have learned, with the joy, fun, wonder and carefree perception that is the gift of an innocent state of mind. I am getting physically younger, while growing spiritually older. I am practicing discipline, balance, fitness, strength and focus in physical, emotional, mental and spiritual contexts. I am doing Yoga, and learning to box. I am determined that THIS life...THIS, WHAT I FEEL COULD BE THE VERY LAST OF MY PHYSICAL LIVES BEFORE THE SEA OF NIRVANA...This is going to be the Life I have always wanted, always worked to create. Always dreamed of. And now - am certain I have earned.